left behind

goodbye my friend
but not forever
on to things bigger and better

i will miss you all day long
i cant believe you'll really  be gone

time to move to somewhere new
what will routine be like without you?

things dont stay the same forever
but i'll miss the smile that lights up any weather

your presence always here
now this change i cannot bear.

i feel so lost without my friends
i wish this day would never end

relationships fade with distance
i wish there was a way to fix this

and the ones i'll miss the most
are the kids who welcomed yossi into their homes

purest hearts you've ever met
their acceptance (of yossi) my safety net

we're not stuck here if we dont want to be
staying put still better and easier for yossi

when the pros outweigh the cons
but everyone else is gone

as 'normal' as we try to be
still left with our reality

 yossi is our pride, our fame
our life is different, not the same

dreams crumbled in a million pieces
we dont know Hashem's reasons

my little boy i'd never trade
but with the joy also comes pain

deep sadness in my heart and mind
when i see i'm left behind

Sorry I'm Not Sorry

Today a student came to my testing center in Crown Heights from the neighboring Williamsburg. I gave her precise directions over the phone, and after the test I asked her if she had any trouble finding us. When she replied negative, I said "good, i didnt think you would have trouble, i drive that route every day so i know it well enough to give clear directions". The student was curious as to why i came to williamsburg every day so i told her that Yossi goes to a special ed school there. Her response was "I'm Sorry"!

I'm not sure why she is sorry, im certainly not, and i told her so. for one, i'm lucky to be a mom at all, and for the record i have the cutest boy in the entire universe and i made sure to tell her so.

I love being a mom and Yossi is the center of my world. everything revolves around him. No question its hard, its really difficult, stressful, and at times gut wrenching. I'm always busy with something that he needs and now he weighs  50lbs and im struggling to lift him.

But my heart is light because G-d chose me to take care of this precious elevated soul. G-d chose me and i couldn't be more delighted. i remember the moment Yossi was placed in my arms for the first time, his sparkling blue eyes  staring up at me, cutting deep into my soul. i was completely taken by him.  Yossi is one handsome fella and his smile wins over everyone he meets. 

im not sorry at all, for his hugs, his exclamations of joy, and his antics that make me double over in laughter.  i'm not sorry when he  reaches for me and call me 'mom' as i walk by and  when he is so proud of himself for a skill or a trick that he mastered.

I'm not sorry that Yossi loves everyone unconditionally. As for the sensitivity and helping hand that Yossi has brought out in our friends, relatives, and community, well im not sorry for that either.

 im not either sorry that i cannot dwell on this one woman's comments any longer; i'm too busy having a blast with  my fun loving boy!